The biggest Tinder No-Go : how to ruin every match // Sunday Thoughts

There is this very popular misconception that will set your chances to go on a date to absolute zero. Tinderellas and tinder dudes listen up!

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Like over 2 million other Germans and half Berlin I use the Datingappinders. In 2017 this is probably nothing special anymore and times I am with more, sometimes with less enthusiasm and success. Swipe to the left, Swipe to the left, Swipe to the right, write, hit. It could be so simple, right? But that is not the case. Here is my open complaint letter about the biggest Tinder No-Go:

The biggest Tinder no-go

Dear men, it annoys me. “Hey, I’m Hans-Dieter Klaus, will we meet a beer tonight?”. No, dear Hans-Dieter Klaus, I have to get to know you first, but with the name surely nothing will be. Other ladies who are in the short-lived online dating on Tinder and co. Have certainly known these annoying messages, and they are sure to hang out with them as well: fast-paced men, who take a maximum of one message to ask for a meeting. Even matches, which otherwise would have been sympathetic, are with this stitch quickly down through. After 50 million users worldwide alone on Tinder after the next love or naja … the next thing anyway, it would be really time to take the topic of online dating etiquette something more serious. The “cover letter and immediately ask for a meeting” should be banned first.

Botanischer Garten Shoot analog mit Model, Fashion Shoot im tropischen Gewächshaus, Blumen ud Palmen Streetstyle Fotografie, Zu Artikel über das größte Tinder No-Go

Why you shouldn’t ask for a date immediately: Tinder no-go number one

1. It comes across pretty lame, listless and disinterested. Who wants to be clarified with a minimum of effort? I’m not the five-minute terrine of the dating world. It is best to send this five-minute terrine-mesh spam-e-mail to absolutely everyone with whom a match was achieved. Pro Tip: Always wipe to the right for the maximum number of matches. Super Pro Tip: A machine that gets the annoying swipes done. If you want the maximum number of matches and minimum number of dates, this is the way to go. 

2. You think it’s a clever shortcut, but you’re wrong. Onlining is exhausting, sorting is exhausting, other people superficially evaluate is exhausting and yes, damn, even long writing is exhausting. But you do not want to know how many gruesome dates last-minute were prevented, because my opponent in the course of writing was then as completely incompatible. Vice versa has just been noticed by writing to many people that they have misjudged me. And fortunately it was spared me by doing an hour to finish and freeing myself of an entire evening, just to waste that time on a person with whom I understand myself. If someone were really willing to meet without any writing, feminists would end up with dates with conservative abortionists, and left voters would agree to a squab with AfD party members. How should I recognize this before? Certainly not on your group picture on Malle. I always write exactly with a person until I can assess the person well enough.

What you think is an abbreviation to my bed will really just end in a boring, unsuccessful date or an instant un-match

Very rarely is the finding of chemistry in a few mails, but that also came before. My fastest date: In the afternoon, written by me, brief back and forth, then from me the question, if he does not want to cancel his evening plans, to go spontaneously with me dance. Sometimes you notice quickly that you have the same mindset – but mostly not. And men, you do not want any bad dates, either?

Botanischer Garten Shoot analog mit Model, Fashion Shoot im tropischen Gewächshaus, Blumen ud Palmen Streetstyle Fotografie, Zu Artikel über das größte Tinder No-GoBotanischer Garten Shoot analog mit Model, Fashion Shoot im tropischen Gewächshaus, Blumen ud Palmen Streetstyle Fotografie, Zu Artikel über das größte Tinder No-Go

3. There are dudes that just look for an abbreviation and there are those whose ego needs an own seat in the airplane. Or a whole series. I understand: you are something very special. You are so special that women alone can take a picture of your back in front of the scenery of some beautiful mountains to introduce children to you. This photo plus the The Weeknd lyrics quote on your profile are completely sufficient to recognize your uniqueness. If you write to someone without introducing yourself, the only correct answer is “Now equal or right now?”. The sight of your dark blue T-shirt from behind makes women almost fainted. Who has ever thought up this pot looking lid story? People like you fit in principle to every woman, you are everyone’s cover! That’s why you need to know each other, after all, you are so special that you are compatible with every woman.

I’m not just anybody

This quote was the actual response to my critique of the five-minute terrine mash aka the absolute Tinder No-Go. I wonder if such people have the bottom line then only dates with people who would simply date anyone.

Botanischer Garten Shoot analog mit Model, Fashion Shoot im tropischen Gewächshaus, Blumen ud Palmen Streetstyle Fotografie, Zu Artikel über das größte Tinder No-Go

The misconception: A swipe to the right is no safe date

I am pretty sure that the popular Tinder No-Go is based on a big fallacy: I often notice that the opinion is common, a match would be the ultimate confirmation that there is interest in a date. Or that a date is even safe. Although I can only speak for myself, but a swipe to the right is made for me quickly. Because for everything else, Tinder is too superficial: I do not want to miss anyone with whom it could work really well, just because he is not the Selfie Pro. So I forgive rather generous matches and see how my opponent is so. Because that’s much more important. Even for sheer hookups.


For me the whole success or failure of the online data results from a good selection process. As silly as it sounds, but believe me: Whether you accumulate postive or negative experiences depends solely on how good you can choose. With so many users is guaranteed something for everyone, you just have to recognize each other. And in order to achieve that, you can think of more than just one sentence, right?

Find more opinions here together with more Sunday Thoughts.

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